105 min., 2005
Written by Brian Nelson
Directed by David Slade
My rating: ★
And I thought The Fourth Kind was bad!!
* * *
The movie begins with two people chatting in an online chat room. The guy sounds like a pervert and the girl sounds like she’s underage. They decide to meet at a coffee shop and get to talking. He comes off as a nice, normal guy and she comes off as extremely pushy, and she talks him into going back to his place to hear some music. They get there and she wants some drinks and she makes some screwdrivers. They drink and he passes out, because she drugged him. As it turns out she has been following him and wants him to confess to being a pedophile. He denies it and she begins the search for evidence.
I don’t mind movies that have an overall agenda, but jesus christ, this one takes the fucking cake! Pedophiles are definitely the scum of the earth and I think they should be killed, but there is a point when you are watching a movie that the monologues need to stop and move on to something more interesting. It felt more like watching a Kevin Smith movie, which I do like his movies, just with really bad acting and a really boring and tired agenda drilled into your skull. Kinda like a header.
Ellen Page tries so hard to be come off as cunning and calculating, but fails on every level. She pushes the dialogue out through her teeth, like a strainer, struggling to keep her character going, but never gets even close to someone I’d really fear. Patrick Wilson is okay as the pedophile and turns in a whole lot better performance that Ellen, but he is still never really convincing as either victim or slimy pedophile.
Both of the acting problems also stem from the really crappy script. Most of what is said is just one giant mantra of the writer trying to get the point across, that Hayley is so smart and Jeff is so innocent or pitiful. The dialogue is some of the most annoying that I’ve seen in a long time, and I’ve been watching some really baaaaad movies. The story is also one of those marks that are just too absurd. This has a 14 year old girl (don’t really know if she is or not by the end, but still), who has everything planned out, even when he breaks free not once, but twice. Really? Really? At least Jeff was more grounded in reality than her.
Unless you want to watch a movie with bad acting, really bad dialogue and a concept that has been done before, just stay away. Nothing about this is remotely good or enjoyable, and just pounds into your head that pedophiles are bad. The writer just doesn’t seem to get that, pedophiles and fucked up Catholics are the only ones that think pedophiles are not a real problem, as EVERYONE else does.Have You Read...?