The Thing [reviewed by Jori]

109 min., 1982
Directed by John Carpenter
My rating:
IMDB • Netflix

Paranoia-inducing fun

* * *

I hate the cold. I would rather sweat in 90 degree weather than have to suffer through a slight chill. So why exactly am I watching a film that is set in Antarctica of all places? Because people, it’s just that good.

A group of American scientists based in Antarctica are preparing to hunker down for the winter (brrr!!) when they get interrupted by some crazy Norwegians trying to kill a dog (noooo!). It turns out that the dog was actually a shapeshifting alien life form that is capable of replicating itself into any other life form it chooses. It’s not about who lives or dies–it’s all about who has become that thing.

Director John Carpenter enhances a very interesting story with fantastic atmosphere. Such a wide open space and yet with how isolated it is, you get a certain feeling of claustrophobia clawing its way to your brain. It’s freezing, there’s no one there but your team, and there is no way to access the outside world for the entire winter season. At that rate, I didn’t even need a monster! (Just that horrible feeling of isolation is enough to horrify me.)

The very capable cast helped tie things up in a perfect bow of awesomeness. Even though Kurt Russell is our big name guy, it’s really an ensemble cast and the chemistry between all of them is outstanding. On the surface we have fairly standard characters–the rough drunkard, the goofy cook, the gun-crazy dude, the nice guy and so on. But everyone gives life to their own and it never ends up feeling like watching generic characters. Everyone is paranoid (and really, who wouldn‘t be after finding out about the whole monster clone thing?) in their own way, culminating into a frenzy of irrational paranoia hopped up on testosterone. This is tension building at its finest!

Of course, we can’t have this conversation (I know, it’s pretty one-sided. But that’s what the comment section is for!) without discussing the actual Thing. The effects are superb!  29 years later and it holds it’s own against newer CG–I dare say it’s still better than a ton of CGI floating around out here. The different incarnations of it throughout the film are all equally disturbing and deliciously gory. Considering it’s a pretty fantastical concept, the effects team somehow makes it look realistic–consider me sufficiently impressed.

After all these years, The Thing still remains to be John Carpenter’s greatest accomplishment. Don’t yell at me about Halloween, I understand how you feel–it’s a brilliant movie. But The Thing surpasses it due to its content.  Anyone can be scared by the thought of a serial killer running loose, it’s easy because anyone can relate to a very real threat. But the idea of something lurking around ready to pounce, that one of your friends could be that something–well, it sounds silly just writing about it. That is the true beauty of this film. Somehow seeing it all unfold before your eyes gives it a credibility that conspiracy theorists everywhere wish they could have.

• Singapore Sling [reviewed by Jori]
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  [2 stars] An orgy of violence
• Fright Night [reviewed by Lackey]
  [3 stars] Not the perfect movie, but the perfect summer timewaster.