The Drudgeon reviews Rabid Grannies

Rabid Granniesaka Les Mémés Cannibales (Original Title)
91 min., 1988
Written by Emmanuel Kervyn
Directed by Emmanuel Kervyn
Language: English
My rating: ★★

What do you expect from a movie called Rabid Grannies!

* * *

The plot of the movie is really kinda pointless in a movie like this so I’ll just hit the major points of the movie.  Two grannies, Victoria (Anne-Marie Fox) and Elizabeth (Danielle Daven) Remington are having their 90 some odd birthday and the whole family has shown up to celebrate.  Well not really as they all really hate the two grannies, and everyone else except themselves, and are hoping they die soon.  Victoria and Elizabeth get a gift, a little wooden box; from a stranger that shows up at their gate and upon opening it a strange smoke emerges.  They start to act strange and then morph into some odd looking “mutants” and start attacking the family, adults and kids alike.  Laughter, gore and chaos ensue.

I would normally love a movie like this, just look at the title and there are some great (albeit cheesy) gore scenes, and let’s not forget the fact that kids are killed (and one of them in an extremely hilarious way) and this should be a favorite of mine.  So what went wrong with it?

When it comes to the acting, not surprisingly, it’s pretty bad, but not for the reason that it should be.  Absurd movies have bad acting (over the top and stupid decisions are made clear that they are that way because it’s a bad movie) as part of the whole “gimmick”, but this one is just bad acting because none of them can act.  Most seem to be trying too hard to be good and that’s where the problem lies.  “Good” acting doesn’t belong in an absurd movie.  Instead of them being part of the absurdity, they are forcefully going against the whole idea of it and they are trying to show off their serious acting chops.  Just a plain dumb idea on both the director and the actors.

The effects are pretty darn good (in that absurd way), but there seems to be a lot of scenes that are poorly edited.  There seems to be more of the scenes that are missing and there seems to be gore that’s missing.  Don’t get me wrong, I understand that scenes are taken out of movies because they are terrible or don’t fit into the film (they are deleted for a reason), but there seems to be scenes that were taken out after it was released for a reason I don’t understand.  Like they went back and took more out of the film to make it less gory.  I don’t know, maybe it’s just really bad editing.

Overall it’s what you would expect from a movie called Rabid Grannies, but the flaws of the film far overshadow the fun of it.  There are scenes where a character is in one place and then we jump to someone else and then back to the original and they are now outside and about a mile away from the house when they were on the second floor and were just standing there.  Now I realize that this is an absurd (dumb, stupid, silly, cheesy, etc.) movie, but in most movies like this the characters don’t just “teleport” all over the place (unless they have that super power).  Characters do stupid things, but they follow what the stupid characters would do and they stay within that realm of stupidity.  This movie has “smart” characters doing really stupid things that don’t fit into what they would do.  It feels really out of place and (again) takes away from the fun of it.  All around it’s just a bad movie.  It could have been a really fun movie but the mistakes, bad editing and “good” acting really ruin all of the potential fun.  The only reason to watch this is for the gore, which is bad but in a good way, and for some of the silliest lines ever.

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About The Drudgeon

I don't remember my real name or where I came from. All I know is that I'm traped in an underground cave with nothing but a TV, DVD player and a notebook and pen. They keep calling me The Drudgeon, I don't even know what that means. Someone keeps dropping horror movies in and yelling at me to watch them and write about what I watch. Then I eat the DVD and case, because they tell me if I consume the horror I will understand the horror. I think there are three of them. So if you are reading this right now, HELP ME!!!!!!! OUCH!!!! Someone just poked me with a sea urchin attacked to a pool cue, what the fuck is going on?
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