The Ward [reviewed by Lackey]

88 min., 2010
Directed by John Carpenter
My rating:
IMDB • Netflix • Official Site

Remember when John Carpenter made really great movies? Sadly, this isn’t one of them.

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Premise

1966: A young woman named Kristen is captured by the police after burning down a rural farmhouse. She’s placed in a psychiatric ward under the care of Dr. Stringer. However, there’s a presence haunting the ward and Kristen’s fellow inmates are disappearing one by one. How are these strange happenings connected to someone named “Alice Hudson”?

Review

So–remember a few months ago when I wrote that I didn’t think John Carpenter was capable of making a film I don’t like? Boy, is my face red.

I’m going to say, in Carpenter’s defense, that the most lackluster element of the production is the story, which he’s not credited for. The characters are weakly drawn and the dynamic between them isn’t particularly credible; one gets the feeling that the film could be re-set at a private girls’ school without having to change a whole lot. (There’s a fig-leaf for some of the less believable stuff, but it’s not a very good one.) The script is irritatingly structured so that the least obnoxious characters die first. The movie relies on too many clichés; it’s never a good sign when you feel that you’re expected to distrust a character (in this case, Dr. Stringer) simply because you never trust characters like him in movies like this. And, um, is there a specific reason for this movie to be set in the mid-’60s, other than to dress Danielle Panabaker up in fetching mod minidresses?

Worst of all, the whole film hinges on a third-act twist that not only destroys any previously-existing reasons to care about what’s happened up to this point, it’s also lifted outright from a psychological thriller that isn’t even a decade old. (You’ve heard of it–not going to name names in the interest of spoilage, but let’s just say that Rebecca DeMornay was in it.)

Carpenter’s assembled a fairly strong cast (casting always was one of his strong points): Amber Heard (Drive Angry, Zombieland) as Kristen, Jared Harris (Fringe, From Within, Mad Men) as Dr. Stringer, plus Panabaker, Lyndsy Fonseca, Mamie Gummer and Laura-Leigh (too good for a last name, eh, Laura-Leigh?) as fellow inmates. They do the best with what they have–although there’s a bit of acting on the parts of Gummer and Laura-Leigh (probably forgivable, because that’s how the characters seem to be written)–but there simply isn’t much to work with. Kristen’s a tough chick; Sarah (Panabaker’s character) is a flirt; Iris (Fonseca) is a know-it-all. That’s all you need to know. Sure, the girls are cute (there’s a great “spontaneous stupid dance” scene about a third of the way through that’s adorable and delightful), and we’ve got that aforementioned fig leaf to cover the lack of development, but wouldn’t it be nice if we had genuine characterization on top of clever explanations and eye candy?

Other aspects of the production betray a lack of imagination or just plain disinterest. Mark Kilian’s score occasionally attempts to imitate Carpenter’s distinct musical style, but inevitably ends up smearing bombastic yet boring orchestral sludge across the soundtrack. Greg Nicotero and Howard Berger handle the makeup, because there’s apparently some sort of law that states that 75% of all mainstream horror films need to hire KNB, and let’s just say they are not at their best here, with the monster’s makeup work in particular looking painfully artificial.

To cap everything, Carpenter seems to be running on autopilot. Sure, the directing is effective; there’s a decent amount of suspense, and the scares are jump-worthy even though you can see most of them coming a mile away. There’s some nice camera work, including a Steadicam establishing shot of the ward itself. What the directing isn’t, is distinctive. What I like about Carpenter’s classic stuff from the ’70s and ’80s, and even later works such as “Cigarette Burns” and the not-particularly-highly-regarded Escape from L.A., is that you can come into them halfway through, not knowing exactly what you’re watching…but you can tell Carpenter directed it.

The Ward never feels like a John Carpenter movie. Overall, it feels like a movie made by someone who wants to imitate Asian horror movies (it’s not a J-horror ripoff, but you can see the influence) without really learning the lessons–kind of like William Malone without the obsession with ’30s architecture. Bottom line: unless you’re a Carpenter completist or you’re nursing a crush on Lyndsy Fonseca, not worth it.

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