The Drudgeon reviews Hatchet

Hatchet 84 min., 2006
Written by Adam Green
Directed by Adam Green
Language: English
My rating: ★★★★★

Now this is an awesome slasher film!

* * *

Ben (Joel Moore) is in New Orleans with a few friends during Mardi Gras.  He gets bored, you see he broke up with his girlfriend a little while ago and everything he sees makes him think of her, so he decides to go on a “scary” boat ride through the swamp.  The only one of his friends that goes with is Marcus (Deon Richmond).  They go to the place and meet Reverend Zombie (Tony Todd) who tells them that he no longer does the rides because they are too dangerous, but he tells them where they can find one.  They get there and meet Shawn (Parry Shen) who is the guide and they also see two girls, Misty (Mercedes McNab) and Jenna (Joleigh Fioreavanti), flashing for a man behind a video camera, Shapiro (Joel Murray) who works for Bayou Beavers.  Ben is all about going and Marcus goes along.  After meeting a few more people, including the not too friendly Marybeth (Tamara Feldman), the boat ride gets underway and we learn the story of Victor Crowley…

The whole cast is just awesome.  From the classics, Robert Englund, Tony Todd and Kane Hodder (who puts in two different performances and both of them are great, plus he also gets to show off another side of him by playing the father), to the newcomers to the horror genre, Joel Moore, Deon Richmond and Tamara Feldman who stand toe to toe with the greats.  All of the characters are believable and they are really fun to watch interact with each other, and there are a ton of great quotes that run throughout almost the whole movie.

Comedy is tossed into the movie, but doesn’t overpower it like a lot of other movies tend to do.  Another thing that tends to happen when comedy is put in a horror movie is that it’s used to calm down the audience so things don’t get too intense.  Because horror fans can’t handle that much suspense or terror?  I just think about (love them or hate ‘em, these movies really don’t let up until the end) The Exorcist, Halloween, Martyrs, I Spit On Your Grave, Cannibal Holocaust, etc… and wonder how scary or tense they would be if they were sprinkled with some comedy.  Once the tension and suspense starts they shouldn’t let up or make the audience feel comfortable.  Horror is about NOT being comfortable, being scared or making you question what you just watched, but the way that a lot of modern directors toss in comedy to calm the audience is almost like they are talking down to us.  We can’t handle it so we’ll make you more comfortable.  Fuck off!  Maybe that’s why Asian horror is having more of an effect on me, because once that ball gets rolling, it really doesn’t let up.

The effects are also great with almost no CG being used.  Another thing that’s great is that the kills are very inventive.  Instead of just stabbing someone, people get hacked to pieces and blood goes flying, and not fucking CG blood.  Just beautiful.

It’s about time we had another great slasher/monster in American film.  There are so many sequels and remakes and reboots that horror has tended to get pretty stale.  The last really good monster that I can remember (please remind me of others if I did forget them) is The Creeper from Jeepers Creepers (love it or hate it, it was at least new).  Hatchet/Victor Crowley is a great example that America still has some life left in it.  It’s a good (overall) original storyline, has great acting with a great cast, good nods to other movies out there and a great sense of pace (which I feel a lot modern movies lack) which makes for a true classic that (should) stand the test of time.  Victor Crowley is a great horror icon that I can see lasting quite a few sequels, and I’m looking forward to them.

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About The Drudgeon

I don't remember my real name or where I came from. All I know is that I'm traped in an underground cave with nothing but a TV, DVD player and a notebook and pen. They keep calling me The Drudgeon, I don't even know what that means. Someone keeps dropping horror movies in and yelling at me to watch them and write about what I watch. Then I eat the DVD and case, because they tell me if I consume the horror I will understand the horror. I think there are three of them. So if you are reading this right now, HELP ME!!!!!!! OUCH!!!! Someone just poked me with a sea urchin attacked to a pool cue, what the fuck is going on?
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