75 min., 2006
Written by Donald Farmer
Directed by Donald Farmer
My rating: ★
How do these movies just keep getting worse?
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We start with a girl named Dawn (Michelle Penick) and her boyfriend Seth (Mike Dusi) who sneaks up on her. She says that guys aren’t allowed in the dorm and forces him to leave. He goes outside and is attacked by some zombies. We then switch to two girls making out. One of them is Amy (Tiffany Shepis) when her boyfriend comes in and gets mad. She kicks him in the crotch and runs away. He then pulls her out of the car, and gets attacked by a zombie. Both are killed and we then switch to two more girls. Sarah (Ciara Richards) who is your stereotypical goth (and vegan) type and her best friend Allison (Adrianna Eder). They bump into the local bitch Clare (Jackey Hall) who are all in the same class with their teacher Dr. Xander (Christopher Slade). The teacher tells them about zombies and shows them that he has a vial of zombie blood. Clare hatches a plan to infect Sarah and gets her friend Julie (Andrea Ownbey) to help.
This is where I normally go into the acting and then the effects. But I’m going to be ignoring both of those and I’m not even going to bring up the story inconsistencies or the magically switching arm tattoo, and just bitch about the movie overall. Yes the acting is some of the worst (if not the worst) I’ve ever seen. The effects are also complete shit and there are very few movies that achieve the level of shitbomb that this movie is. I understand that this is a backyard movie and there was probably no budget, but I’ve seen movies with less budget and completely no-name actors do an extremely fun and surprisingly professional job. A lot of times there are problems, but you can see the talent that is hidden underneath the bad movie. This movie on the other hand is the complete opposite. There is nothing here (hidden or obvious) that shows a hint of talent. Even Tiffany Shepis who is really good in most of the other movies I’ve seen her in, is just complete crap this time around. I don’t know what the hell happened with her, but all her talent went down the shitter when this script hit her hands. Now you can give me the whole explanation that they weren’t concerned about effects and acting, and they just wanted to make a fun movie. I’ve seen movies that are made just for fun (Thankskilling, Jack Frost, Colonel Kill Motherfuckers, etc.) but they are at least trying. This movie they aren’t even remotely trying. Everything is edited poorly, there are shots where the actors weren’t even together during their scenes, the sound is rotten (when you hear the wind that is blowing by the camera, that’s a bad sign), and sets (or places where it was shot) are just complete garbage. There is nothing that is remotely good or entertaining about this. It’s so bad you can’t even make fun of it. The only way that I suggest you watch this is if you are brain dead, and that’s even stretching it.Have You Read...?